Tuesday, November 06, 2018


Everybody needs good neighbours. My downstairs neighbours are not good neighbours.

It is currently being infested by the owners son and his wife. The owner's daughter lived there for a year and a half or so, with her new husband. They were terrible human beings. I've never heard such noisy people. And they had the audacity to complain I was noisy, because I once made a noise after 10pm. They were regularly loud after midnight, and even woke my at 3am in the morning. She has a laugh that could scare witches into becoming regular humans. When they were having sex it sounded like a thousand cats being strangled by a submental ogre. When I told them I could hear her laugh she was (fake) shocked and (fake) embarrassed. But it didn't twig that I could hear them sexing. I one banged on my floor in frustration - i had guests round in the afternoon and we were all treated to sex sounds that would be too unrealistic for a porn.
They then decided that every time they could so much as hear me that would aggressively bang on the ceiling repeatedly. I was delighted when they moved out.
She once sent me a text at 1130pm (because I dropped a pan) saying "it is after midnight and the banging continues. I would be grateful if it could stop" so I blocked her.
A few weeks later when they were sexing loud enough to scare away the neighbourhood foxes, I sent that same message back to her. Finally, the penny dropped.

His son who is currently there (on a temporary holiday I hope) is also very deaf. It's 11:08pm and his TV is on so loud I can almost hear every word. It was like that during the day too.
The irony is the owner is an ENT specialist. I want to ask him if his whole family is deaf, or if they're just selfish hypocrites.

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