Sunday, March 31, 2013

google vs google

when one google source and another google sauce tell you different things, who do you trust?

i remember when i was at uni, my brain was so fried one day, that when i was doing a shopping list i attempted to write down pasta sauce, but couldn't remember any way to spell sauce, other than source.

so, in my blog, my page view count for submentals is 93!
except, when i go to google analytics for my website, the page view count is 15!

who to trust?

the bigger number. obviously.

Thursday, March 28, 2013

dog racing

this was just brought to my attention.

i think monkey jockeys would improve this sport immeasurably.

Sunday, March 24, 2013

a russian doll part II

I like the roman numerals in titles.

recently, i spoke to the 2nd hottest russian i'd ever seen. a follow up from my previously failed attempt. (attempts if you include times i didn't say what i wanted.)

this time went much better. (having been poker schooled, when i say better i am not being results orientated in my analysis.) i managed to say,
"this is what i wanted to say last time and i hope you will understand my accent."
(in russian) "you are very beautiful."
she smiled and said thanks
"i am not finished yet."
(in russian) " i want to take you out for a drink"
she smiled again. i have seen this smile before. it's a 'not a fucking chance' smile. i hoped i was wrong.
she said "you are very kind"
she paused.
i said "you can answer my question with a yes"
"firstly" she said, "i want to say thanks, you are nice. secondly, no"
it was my turn to smile. it may not have gone perfectly to plan, in execution or result, but i had to ask.

Thursday, March 21, 2013

encourage courage

on one of my many walks outside the office to avoid work inside the office, i thought of the words courage and encourage which sound so similar yet seem so far apart.

i would say i have approximately no courage. there are a few people at work with courage. one who is very smart. he speaks bluntly, yet is almost always correct.

i envy them. the good envy where i want to practice to be more like them.

then i saw challenger, the film based on richard feynman and his position on the enquiry into discovering the reason why challenger exploded. he had courage. he was a genius. so he was almost always right.

i don't think i'm that smart. i know that there are many many people better at anything i can do. so how can i speak up when i'm not always right?

in order to do so, i would need an injection of self esteem, and this would probably be in the form of encouragement. and then i realised of the link between courage and encouragement. encouragement > self esteem > courage to speak up and stand up for what you believe.

maybe however, it's all in my head, which was filled at the time with great boredom and perhaps i'm seeing links which aren't there.

Thursday, March 14, 2013

no, you.

The age old question of, "I know you are but what am I?"
By the time you reach 25, you tend to do this slightly less. However that's only because it gets replaced.
You find you'll start saying, "you're projecting." It means exactly the same thing but is somehow more acceptable. helped no doubt by House.

Funnily enough, as any poker player will tell you, you project all the time. Usually subconsciously.
For example, you like to bitch about people at work when you're frustrated, so you expect others to do likewise. In fact, when they don't, you become concerned for their mental well being.
of course, you're just projecting your attitude on to everyone else and thinking if they don't think the same as you, they're bad. and that is a surefire recipe for disaster if you're a poker player. unless you're a bad poker player, when most other people do actually think like you. except you will still lose because you're bad.

Monday, March 11, 2013

goal achieved!

i made it to 80kg!
though i think my belly is now a bit fat. this is terrible news because it means i will need to start doing some cardio work. and showering in a gym is quite unpleasant. mostly due to the unabashed nudity waved in your face. everyone knows the male form is not something aesthetically appealing.

oh, and i'm in love. with this.

Sunday, March 10, 2013

My (Acting) CV

Name: Mudwig
Address: London
Other: (I have a blog)

School, Poker, Brain, Travel

Can grow a bread very quickly.
Have extensive historical use of a 'poker face'
Extensive experience of feigning interest in (bad beat) stories - I was acting!
I do not sing. I concentrate on using my voice for 'acting'
I can memorise things. Sometimes more than one thing at a time.
I will accept kissing Mila Kunis and Natalie Portman at the same time. But only if the role demands it.
I do not mind if i have to cut my hair or grow it.
I can be presented with - or without - glasses.
I've seen telly vision so i know what people expect.
I can wear a huge variety of outfits (you will have to provide them).
I once told a woman that they she wasn't at all crazy (she was. i was acting. again).
Can pretend to speak one of many foreign languages.

Contact my agent.

Monday, March 04, 2013

oh my gosh i was wrong

turns out a compressed spring does have more mass!

i don't really get it so will have to read more about it.

Saturday, March 02, 2013

my brain doesn't like me

following the yaks advice i went russian.

so i had it all planned out in my head.
to say "hello". in russian.
to hear "hello" back.
to say "what's your name" (still in russian).
to hear "[name]" back.
to say "hi, [name]. you are very (very) beautiful. i have a question for you. i would like to take you out for a drink" (still in russian).

1) to hear "erm..."
to say, "great, saturday night. after work" (in russian)

2) to hear "yes"
to say "great, saturday night. after work" (in russian)

3) to hear "no"
to say "sorry, i don't understand. yes, or yes?" (in russian)
to hear much lolling

1), 2), 3) - great success.


i say "hello" (in english)
i hear "hi"
i say "you are russian?" (in english)
i hear "yes"
i say "i'm learning russian, you want to help me learn?" (in english. i wonder if this is what it's like to squeeze your own balls in a vice with everyone you went to primary school watching.)
i hear "go on a course. there are lots"
i say "bit busy, would rather have someone help me"
i hear "i'm a bit busy too"

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