it's been a week since my last post and since i'm off round the world (kinda) in a couple of days it will be my last post for a week.

this will be the first month that i haven't hit platinum status since march. last month i played hard on the final day to get platinum status and blew about $1k to do it, so i'm not playing just cos i have to. been an ok month anyway. stars keeps freezing on my comp, usually when i have the HEM HUD running, so it's a bit awkward playing there atm. barely played any hands but been doing ok. very swingy days but thats just the cards. though on monday or tuesday i tilted off 3 buyins in a few hands when i knew i was getting tired. that annoyed me and i took a couple of days off. first time i've tilted all month.
even after all my bad play, tilt still is my biggest leak, though i find i don't tilt at higher stakes, and notice my mistakes more. maybe i should just bluescouse it up and hope to run good for a week.

also, i'm 11k away from supernova so i'll just get that next month.

today's post will be bad since I have no funnies i can recall of late. i will have to try to find an old one. couldn't find one. i will have to go for philosophy instead.

it snowed here in london in october for the first time since 1934. i happened to be outside playing football at the time. it was picturesque, but as i didn't have my camera i will have to save it in my head. unfortunately, i cannot upload this image to blogger.com. maybe i will be able to one day in the future.

end of post.

as an aside, i find i get angry at myself when i let things that annoy me get me angry. i worry that this is an infinite loop of anger and wonder how i ever manage to break it.

edit: remembered what i actually intended to write about.
this blog about dropout playing poker was interesting
Law school Dropout
i read it from start to finish. motivational/inspirational although there is a lot of overwritten stuff to get through.
sadly 2005 and 2006 got lost. they were the best bits.

followers

i have none.

i don't follow it. personally, i prefer more popular blogs like some of the links on the right.

i was on the train today, in a quiet carriage. apparently you're not allowed to use your phone or play music in this carriage.
so about one third of the way into the journey two people answer their phones near each other. a guy from a few seats in front comes to them individually telling them off!

anyways, so towards the end of the journey a guy sitting behind me answers his very loudly ringing phone. someone pretty much appears out of nowhere and says "YOU KNOW YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO ANSWER YOUR PHONE, SO WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?"
without batting an eyelid he continues in conversation "hold on a sec, i have to move out the carriage, a very militant man just told me off!"

i laughed on the inside, not out loud, i was a little scared of him.

layout

it is changed

i liked the green. but i had to change it cos the layout was broken. between posts there was no spacing between the end of one and the start of the next!

i looked in the html but couldn't fix it, so i had to get rid of it. it was annoying me greatly. i think i have mild ocd/retardation.

variance

i don't think many poker players truly understand the beast that is variance.

its not even whether you are up or down in equity that is the biggest bit imo.

the biggest bit is simply the hands you are dealt and the hands that others are dealt. whether you play them, whether they play them and how it's played leads to showdowns and all in ev.

for example, i played 700 hands earlier today. got dealt very little, never got a decent spot preflop, managed to break even/win a little.

next session this evening, played 300 hands, got dealt good hands, other people got dealt slightly worse hands, i win lots of $$$

being able to fold the slightly worse hands in the right spots, and figuring out which is the right spot to fold is the skill that saves lots of monies.

the all in ev after that is out of your hands and therefore irrelevant.

this is why bad play by me annoys me as it's what i can control.

control is a funny thing in life. some people i know like to drive, and not be driven! i cannae believe it.

i haven't had many funny thoughts recently. i'm not depressed. and i haven't put on the weight that i wanted (all in muscle form obv). i've noticed depressed people are fat. i see a plan on the horizon...

it was the best of times, it was the blurst of times

i hate playing against retards. it feels like you either take candy from a baby, or lose to people who have trouble dressing themselves in the morning. lose lose situation.

today i played like a retard. sadly however, this is also a lose lose situation.

i also watched all of entourage recently. not all that funny, but good enough to purchase.

i first watched it all in 3 days. i often do things like that. it's good because you watch it all at once. however, when you have finished, you want more to watch. i guess it's sometimes good to space things out. the machine from men in black that can erase your memory would be good in certain circumstances if you could control it specfically. you could erase the memory of a film say, and watch it for the first time, many times!

blogs of note

i just read the last four blogs of note on blogger.

i think the only notable thing, which i should add they all have in common, is that they are incredibly dull. notably dull.

one was i think some sort of cookery blog. ok, wat? second was a picture of random cats not doing funny things. a third was some random guy with a job. the fourth i don't even remember.

i, on the other hand, have been hitting the town. what is depressing is how little alcohol it now takes to get me drunk, and then hungover. i didn't eat before i went out, and this helps reduce time spent at bar since less drinks are required. i also threw up in my sleep last time i ate during a heavy night. that was pretty disgusting. i then read the next day about some kid who choked and died on his own vomit in his sleep. i guess i escaped with just a hangover. hangover + vomit + less money is worse than hangover. so eating didn't really achieve anything positive.

still, i'd rather throw up in my sleep than be a blog of note.