Monday, June 15, 2009

2 tips and elbow fights

tip #1. if you meet an old friend, don't tell them they look old
tip #2. don't wake up at 330am, wear a 7.31kg backpack, and go running for a bus in the morning.

i arrived at the bus station 2 minutes late, and 10 seconds from heart failure. but the airport bus was later than me. 7 long minutes later it turns up, clearly delighted that it made me run for nothing. it's a one hour journey to the airport, and i'd left myself 30mins to get there before the gate closed - get through security, travel delays etc. down to 21 minutes now.
bus driver lets on people with the right ticket (like me). usually other drivers just let everyone on together but no, not our special driver. he seems to think there are a lot of people at the stop (~12 left). so he does the sensible thing and starts counting the number of free seats on his bus. he gets off the bus, and lets two people on. he then gets back on the bus to count the number of seats available. and lets two people on.
he repeats this process like an ocd riddled noah. 15 mins of buffer time remain when we finally depart.

i arrived in latvia, complete with the knowledge that 1 lat (what kind of a lazy currency name is that?) is worth more than one pound according to exchange rates - though obviously stuff is cheaper there than england. the cause for concern is that i treat foreign money like poker chips. play money chips if i'm being honest. and having them worth more than actual money is not a good thing for my bank balance.

as for lativa, in common with most non-british countries, personal space seems to be non existent. i sat down on my plane home, and some latvian dude sat down next to me. he planted his arm on the shared armrest taking up almost it's entirety. this would not have bothered me. except his arm then continued to move in my direction beyond the edge of the armrest into my chair space. he did not arrest his advancement until his elbow was firmly in contact with my forearm. this was war.

i noticed he had left free a small area of armrest between the chair and his arm. a schoolboy mistake. i cunningly placed my elbow there. this was effectively taking all four corners of an othello board, leaving my opponent helpless. as i impinged slowly on his space, advancing towards complete armrest domination he began to realise the futility of his situation, and how he had been outflanked in a manoeuvre napolean would have been proud of. he tried to retaliate by leaning toward me and sticking his face as close to the window as possible without touching me, but i just pretended to be asleep when he did that.
game over nikolais.


Bruce said...


Bossanova21 said...


that's level 43 thinking there, re-raising with the elbow, then bluffing when pretend to sleep

Amatay said...

ahaha i recently played elbow wars on my trip to Vegas. Why you go to Lativa fish? I heard there are loadsa fit birds in Rita?

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