Sunday, October 09, 2011

a new thing i've been working on

i heard that you should never get angry. sometimes you may need to feign anger, but that should only be on the outside. this concept interests me immensely and so i have been trying to not be angry about anything.

being aware of this and trying to catch myself at the onset of the rage building isn't as tough as i imagined. nor is it as tough as preventing the rage from building.
a good marker for me is the effect that other mong drivers have on me. when i don't get angry from middle lane drivers ruining the roads for everyone, i know i'm in a much better mental state. i do wonder if what i'm doing is just bottling it up, or a long term cure...

been trying to play more poker as of this month. so far i've managed about 18 hours and 10k hands which i think is ok. i still want to aim for about 5 hours a day 6 days a week. anyway, als updated the bar on the right hand side, hoping to play better as the month goes on!


Anonymous said...

I think we need anger, If I couldn't fire of the occasional heart felt, heat of the moment, "you fucking fuck, fuck, bastard, cunt, wank" at some one I'd just die. Though this has undoubtedly limited by career aspirations at times after I have fired of at a senior, I can live with this for the pure joy of telling someone the absolute truth as I see it.

Mudwig said...

i think telling the absolute truth, and calling people wankers can both be completely separate to feeling anger for or from those bastards.
also feelings of hatred towards people are separate and not to what i refer when i mean anger. i wonder if that all makes the distinction about what i was saying clearer?
or maybe i just need to lay of the angel dust.

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